You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
