I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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