We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
