Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
