you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize