Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
