Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
