Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize