Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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