I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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