he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize