i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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