Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize