so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Boobs are out for the taking
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
