We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
