i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
We had sex on a dog bed..
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
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