If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
where are my eyebrows?
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
