what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
