Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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