she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize