i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize