But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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