38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
