When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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