just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize