If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
