Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
This house was built for laser tag.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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