But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
