Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
