I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Randomize
