3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
