I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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