evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
