I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
a search helicopter?!
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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