I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
