Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize