I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
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