its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
