So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Randomize