Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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