I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Randomize
