god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize