You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
