Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
