Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize