There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Randomize
