He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
BRING THE BAGELS
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
