Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
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