i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
