He managed to light the Jello on fire...
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
