im about as happy as oj after his trial
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
